Monday, February 20, 2012

1st 2 weeks back!

OK well I told you guys that I was going to try and keep the whole email every week thing going and I meant it.  Personally I think that it keeps a pretty good journal, in all of the back and forth letters that I have written in the total 15 months of my mission i was able to have 256 pages of back and forth communication, all with weekly events personal experiences and testimony.  If I can get that all organized into a good format, it might even be worth printing out and making into a bound book, but that is still a ways down the line.

Cool well since there were no questions, I guess I should just launch right into it.

I have really enjoyed being home, the transition was definitely easier this time around but by no means easy.  I think there is some kind of minor depression that goes into going from hyper-drive into humdrum speed.  Going forward always having something important to do and say and never having a spare moment to, twiddling my thumbs trying to find things to do and give myself purpose.  There are real valid blessings to being a missionary of having all of that life style even if the trade offs are severe anxiety getting dizzy and passing out every once in a while.   :)  (BTW I think that I express myself better in email/writing than in speaking, maybe its because I can be more open, chew over my words feel if they are honest at the core and then decide I'm good with them, even if they are strong, because they are honest)

Quick update (SINCE BEING HOME)
  1. watched Captain America (AWESOME) * * * *
  2. watched Harry Potter 7 Part two (AWESOME) * * * *
  3. Read Book 4 of Eragon (AWESOME) * * * *
  4. Have applied to work at a bunch of different places no luck yet but i have had a couple of good leads and need to follow up on a few others.
  5. I have scheduled a consultation for my surgery, it will be at the end of the month, and the surgery within two weeks after that.
  6. Met with bishop and he wants to make me a veil worker (I'M SO EXCITED THAT WOULD BE AWESOME!)
  7. and other than that i have just been trying to keep busy, enjoy the time that i have with my family, especially my little brothers and start keeping in contact with people so that i don't loose the connections that I made with people while on my mission.

A couple of good spiritual experiences that I had since I have been home have been, 1 when I reported to the high council, and 2 when I did sealings in the temple with dad.

STORY TIME!
OK so when I got home I was able to go and see president Ostler that first afternoon and get released.  That was pretty much the same way it went last time other than it wasn't so traumatizing ;) and he informed me that I would be reporting to the High Council on Sunday before church.  Then between when I found out and that morning I think I was reminded by my parents about 5-6 different times, I love you guys but I get the message on the second or third try! but I was an amazing experience because I wasn't the only missionary released I was one of four reporting to the high council that day, the others were Elder Tyler Fletcher, Elder Andrew Nicole, and Elder Blake Decker.  It was made amazing because while reporting we were asked to give our name, where we served, a spiritual experience that we had on our mission, and our testimony.  Well Tyler Fletcher went first and talked about a woman he had been teaching who had broken every commandment in the book, but then met the missionaries and was able to turn it all around, and find true happiness through the gospel. Andrew talked about being able to work with people and help them and serve them, Blake talked about teaching a pastor and helping him realize the truthfulness of the restored gospel.  And I spoke about Dominga and Juan Jose and how the gospel can change out lives and how happy we really can be.  Being able to hear the testimonies and experiences of other returned missionaries was amazing, it was a place where the spirit was able to speak and testify to each of us individually and as a whole.  I never have really doubted that the  church was true, it was one of those things where I was born knowing and the first time I prayed to know, I got an answer more like "you already know that it's true, why do you need to ask?"  and I've been able to see things and have different experiences that have only built that testimony and never taken away from it.  Through all the hard time that we can possibly experience , we have a choice we can either become bitter or better, and i choose to come closer to god.  Being in that room and feeling of those testimonies was a great experience and served to build my testimony of what i know to be right.

And the other spiritual experience that I had in the past two week was that I was able for the first time in my life go and perform sealings.  That was a different experience then i am used to in the temple, it was smaller and seemed to me to be much more personal.  It was just me, dad, and grandpa king, with two other couples and the... sealer(?).  and as we sat down and were able to perform these sacred ordinances it really hit me how great the whole plan of salvation really is.  It reminds me of the temple movie that the church put out to help people understand what temples are "between heaven and earth" and this part where Elder Holland says "...heaven wouldn't be heaven for me if I didn't have my wife, and my family..."  and i would just like to echo that thought. It really wouldn't be all that great of a place if we were doomed to be alone for the rest of our lives in paradise, we would probably all eventually go crazy. and so as i sat and was a witness to the couples being sealed and listening to the blessings being promised I was touched by the spirit again testifying that this is true and that god is behind all of it. (that's why i went on a brief temple walk afterwards just to soak it all up being able to have the blessing of a temple so close at hand."

GOALS
OK so This is more because Shannon was pestering me to make a list of Goals of all the things that I want from life and things like that, that I decided to put in this section and hey, I did hear that if you tell someone your goals the chances of you actually achieving those goals goes up by like 50% so what the heck I want to be successful so this might become a weekly thing of goals I have short term (this weekly), and some long term ones too. then we might be able to connect the dots.

So starting with the biggest and the smallest seems easiest to me.  Biggest I want to become like my heavenly father, and live in the celestial kingdom.  pretty simple and straightforward. and well the goal that is going to take residence over every other goal that I have so this should get he headline vote of what I want to do.  So between here and there there are a couple of things that I need to do
  1. keep covenants
  2. daily study
  3. attend church meetings/activities
  4. weekly temple attendance
  5. constantly repent(become more Christlike)
All the other goals i have are pretty short term, find a job, recover from surgery, start dating, get to 10-15% body fat, go back to school, and see about going back out on a mission.  All good ones and the one everyone is probably most interested in is the last one, and why I would even make that a goal.  Well, its because in spite of the mission being the hardest part of my life so far (I haven't been a parent yet) it is the one that makes me the most happy, it makes me feel like i have purpose and that I am doing what i am supposed to be doing.  now do i know if i will yet.  no there are a lot of hurtles that i still have to jump through to make that one happen and I'm not sure that it is the course of least resistance at all.  am at one of those junctures again in my life where i think god would be good with both choices and everyone else seems to be complacent to do the same thing.  I know go has accepted my sacrifice and that i completed my mission from the experience that I had in the temple, but if there is more that i can do, i want to do it.  and maybe i'm supposed to stay here and fulfill a calling and i would be ok with that but i want to work in the lords kingdom and help move his work along, because nothing brings me greater happiness.

anyways i kinda feel like i went off on a rant there.  but it feels good to get that all out of my system.  Also another good reason why weekly emails would be a good thing!, oh and i think I am changing my P-Days to Sunday as the day that I get ready to face the rest of the week(spiritually) I'm still going to have to shop on other days.  but it also gives me a chance to write an email, which i don;t usually get the chance during the rest of the week, or at least i won't as soon as i get an actual schedule going.

so that pretty much brings you up to speed on everything that has been going on.

My plans for this week are to:  go hiking with Aaron and Tate, see star wars in 3D, get a father's blessing from dad for family home evening, laser tag with singles ward on Tuesday, basketball with singles ward on Thursday, maybe clean house on Wednesday. and get a exercise routine down that i might be able to carry over into other schedules like running/biking in the morning or p90x or something. if i can do that on top of finding a job, and going to the temple on Friday.  I will have had a pretty successful week!

anyways I'm running out of things to say, a lot more has happened that is probably worth writing about but I can share all of that later!

LOVES!

OK NOW IF YOU'RE WONDERING YOU MAY ASK ME QUESTIONS ABOUT PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING AND I WILL RESPOND, THIS ALSO SERVES AS A PERSONAL JOURNAL AND I PROBABLY WON'T WRITE ANYTHING DOWN IF I'M NOT FORCED TO THINK ABOUT IT AN FORM AN OPINION. SO FEEL FREE TO ASK ANY QUESTIONS IT'S GOOD FOR ME TO THINK AND PROCESS, I WILL ANSWER HONESTLY. NOW WHETHER OR NOT YOU GET THE ANSWER TO YOU QUESTION THOUGH IS A DIFFERENT STORY.